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Jun. 16th, 2008

(no subject)

So, only one more final and then my sophomore year of high school is all over.

I couldn't be more pumped about that. Only two more years. I'm ready to get on with my life.

So this summer is going to be epic in spots but mostly uneventful. I have my radio show, of course, and I'm sure there will lots of great shows (Four Year Strong, Mayday Parade, Forever the Sickest Kids and Sparks the Rescue at the Station July 21st and Warped Tour July 23rd, to name a few). I'm also going to jazz camp for a week, which will be fun. Maybe it'll give me a Jessie and chance to reconnect. We've been kind of distant lately, I don't like it.

And then... dun dun dun.... Summer's End! I can't explain how excited I am for that. I think it's going to be really really good for me. I need to meet some new people, too. I'm stoked.

So that's pretty much it in my life. I hate being unproductive, but I always end up sitting here for hours on end. I need to find something to occupy myself with that doesn't involve online message boards and facebook. Seriously.

Peace

Jun. 5th, 2008

(no subject)

It's safe to say I'm not okay
That's what I get for waiting
Patiently is not for me
Now I'm up all night with you and cheap champagne
I haven't thought of you in days
That's right, I'm thoroughly
Contemplating lines and scenes
Cause in the end I'm here to entertain

I've got a good thing going tonight
I just can't stand to see you go
Well, take me home
Tell me what you wanted
I will never know

It's safe that we'll be okay
I've been anticipating
Anxiously, it's right for me
Now I'm up all night
Just trying to explain
What made you drink, sit and sink
You've got so much to lose
And lose and lose again

So take a good look brother tonight
Just let the bright lights take us home
Well, take me home
Tell me what you wanted
I will never know
Tell me what you wanted
I will never know

So take a good look brother tonight
Just let the bright lights take us home
Well, take me home
Tell me what you wanted
I will never know
Tell me what you wanted
I will never know
Tell me what you wanted
(Let's just drink)
I will never know
(Sit and sink)
You've got so much to lose, but I don't
Tell me what you wanted
(Let's just drink)
I will never know
(Sit and sink)
You've got so much to lose, but I don't

Apr. 27th, 2008

(no subject)

Wow, I really suck at remembering to write in here.



Just shows you how little time I have to whine about my problems to strangers online, eh?

Mar. 1st, 2008

(no subject)

So I've pretty much accepted that I'm not going to have a meaningful relationship until at least college...




Which is kind of depressing, but I should probably just get over it.

Feb. 24th, 2008

Shows!

Warped Tour looks amazinggggg this year. :)

Mayday Parade, All Time Low, Forever the Sickest Kids, Four Year Strong, and Say Anything, to name a few.

I'm quite excited. Also it looks like I might be able to see Bayside with the Starting Line and Four Year Strong in Worcester, Mass in April.

<333333

I love this.

I also feel the need to repost this:

"Here's to the kids. Here's to the kids who would rather spend their night with a bottle of whiskey & Sonny playing on their headphones than go to some vomit-stained high school party.
Here's to the kids whose 11:11 wish was wasted on one person who will never be there for them.
Here's to the kids whose idea of a good night is sitting on the hood of a car, watching the stars.
Here's to the kids who never were too good at life, but still were wicked cool.
Here's to the kids who listened to Fall Out Boy and Hawthorne Heights before they were on MTV...and blame MTV for ruining their life.
Here's to the kids who care more about the music than the haircuts.
Here's to the kids who have crushes on a stupid lush.
Here's to the kids who hum "last chance to lose your keys" when they're stuck home, dateless, on a Saturday night.
Here's to the kids who have ever had a broken heart from someone who didn't even know they existed.
Here's to the kids who have read The Perks of Being A Wall Flower & didn't feel so alone after doing so.
Here's to the kids who spend their days in photobooths with their best friend.
Here's to the kids who are straight up smartasses & just don't care.
Here's to the kids who speak their mind.
Here's to the kids who consider screamo their lullaby for going to sleep.
Here's to the kids who second-guess themselves on everything they do.
Here's to the kids who will never have 100 percent confidence in anything they do, and to the kids who are okay with that.
Here's to the kids."

Feb. 23rd, 2008

(no subject)

I feel really shitty all of a sudden right now.


I don't really know why.


So, um, this sucks...

=/

last night

I went to a fucking fantastic show at the Station. The last great show there, most likely.

Sparks the Rescue, Radiation Year, the Sophomore Beat, Dean Ford/The Goodnight Process, and the Shams.

Sparks was indescribable. They played fifteen songs, including Icestorm, You're Not Alone, and Psalm. I was ridiculously excited and pretty much made a fool of myself the entire time. I don't give a damn.

Sophomore Beat was so much fun as well.

Kudos to all those guys for an amazing show.

Feb. 17th, 2008

(no subject)

I am wrecked. I am overblown.
I am also fed up with the fucking common cold!
When I just want to feel alive for the first time in my life,
I just want to feel attractive today.


That kind of describes my life right now.
All of my favorite songs are too short for my liking.

Um, so. It's been five weeks since I wrote in here. Life gets in the way. I'm bogged down with homework over vacation. These past two weeks have just been insane.

But. I have two amazing shows that I'm looking forward to that are keeping me going. Sparks on Friday has the potential to be the greatest show I've ever seen. Motion City Soundtrack in May will be equally amazing.

We played our first show without Zach on Friday. It was fun. I think we all felt a lot more comfortable on stage, I know that I did. Not to mention the cute guy in the front row who kept looking at me... it might've been the pants. But I really wish I had more confidence, I wish I had talked to him. I'm regretting it already.

I have a nasty habit of noticing really cool people but never getting the courage to talk to them. Mostly boys. It's really, really annoying and I can't help but think that maybe if I had taken the chance I wouldn't be so fucking lonely.

Also. I've been sick for the past week and it's killing me. I wanted to start running but I can't with this fucking cold. Ugh.

Basically I'm trudging through water that's up to my waist, moving slowly just one day at a time until I can get over this river. I'm not really sure what the river is, but I'm searching for something. I'll know it when I find it, because right now I'm just barely making it day to day, a set list of tasks and things to do until I can sleep. I really don't enjoy living like this. There's too much to do.

I need someone to take my mind off of it.

Jan. 11th, 2008

(no subject)

acoustic open mic nights = love. so amazing.


death cab and cute things in general are what I'm really into right now. I love acoustic anything.



umm... so yeah. mid-terms this week. it's going to suck. but I'll survive.


goodnight.

Jan. 9th, 2008

(no subject)

I've begun to let go.





I still miss him, though. Not him now, him how he used to be.

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